Birthdays are natureโs way of telling us to eat more cake.
โEdward Morykwas
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The seven ages of man: spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills and wills.
โ Richard J. Needham
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Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I donโt really know.
โ Andy Borowitz
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The number one cause of death is too many birthdays.
โ Anonymous
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Middle age is when youโre faced with two temptations and you choose the one that will get you home by nine oโclock.
โ Ronald Reagan
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If youโre given a birthday card with no money in it and no present attached to it, good manners dictate that the minimum length of time you should act like youโre actually reading it is eleven seconds.
โ Anonymous
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Donโt give me scratch-off lottery tickets for a present and then say, โIf you win, we have to split it.โ No, thatโs not how presents work. I donโt buy you boots and then ask for the left one back or wine coolers and then keep two. Have some etiquette.
โ Ruminations.com
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You know youโre getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party.
โ Melanie White
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It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, โRemember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, youโll find one at the end of your arm.โ
โ Sam Levenson
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The best birthdays of all are those that havenโt arrived yet.
โ Robert Orben